Meet Nelson

This is Nelson. He's a member of our family. Unfortunately he's not the real Nelson. D and I were sincerely hoping he'd stand in for the real one. Apparently our brilliant idea of a pretend Nelson didn't work.

I know you're now thinking, "She's finally flipped her lid--we knew it would happen one day." I'm okay though. I did drop a lid this morning but I haven't flipped one yet. I do need to elaborate so you have an idea of who the real Nelson and who the substitute Nelson are.

This past Christmas we had the fortune (or misfortune, depending on how you look at it) of meeting a cat named Nelson. A few short days before Christmas we took the boys to the pet store to buy gifts for SissyDawg. As is the case with most people, we took a walk by the animals available for adoption. Mistake. Big Mistake.

M locked eyes with a very cute black cat named Nelson. The infatuation was reciprocal. M wanted to know everything he possibly could about the cat, and their eyes followed each other from one side of the store to the other. It was sweet, in a disturbing stalker-ish way. We visited Nelson several times that evening before leaving the store and leaving Nelson behind. Out of sight, out of mind, right? Not hardly.

The next morning I asked M what he wanted to do that day. He was very specific in his request: "I want to go back to the Dog Store and get that Nelson cat." This went on several times a day for several days, with increasingly pleading doe eyes. It didn't look good for getting out of this one, even with the long and detailed explanation of how Nelson would make him itch. We even had papers from the doctor to prove it. He still wasn't buying into that excuse.

Santa came up with the brilliant idea that Nelson moved to the computer and M could play with him via the Nelson Webkinz. It seemed to work. The Nelson/M connection was there, not as strong, but seemed to be there and it was especially fun for him to take care of Nelson on the computer. I had a false sense of security that Nelson was now and forever a stuffed cat, never a live one in his memory.


Fast forward to two days ago. A conversation takes place. It goes this way:

M, crawling sweetly into my lap: Do you want a pet, Mommy?

Me: I sure do. Will you be my pet?

M: No, I not a pet. I want a kitty.

Me, playing along: What is a kitty? And how do we get a kitty?

M: First we go to the Dog Store. Then we pick out a kitty. His name is Nelson and I want him.

Me, trying to keep a straight face: You can't have a kitty. They make you itch.

M, still not buying the itch excuse: I want to go to the Dog Store and get that Nelson cat!!!

That last bold phrase has been repeated multiple times since. The child has a memory like a steel trap. Unfortunately.






I wll not give in...I will not give in...I will not give in...I will not give in...

You Should See the Other Guy

Really, surprisingly, the Other Guy (also known as N) is none the worse for wear. At least after that scuffle.


But J did learn a good vocabulary lesson. He now knows very well the meaning of the words "instigate" and "antagonize." Actually, they both know since they both were equal starters and participants in this battle. But I was the finisher!

Boys. I just can't figure out what makes them start wailing on one another for no apparent reason. From my untrained eyes there appears no obvious provocation. I must be wrong though, since it seems merely walking by one another is enough to evoke attack instincts. Lions should be lucky enough to have such great reflexes.

As part of the "what makes you go 'duh' today" moment, I present to you the fact that we are paying good money to have someone teach them to smack others. And do it well. Effectively and efficiently even. Go figure.

They do tend to get along better than most siblings I know. They have their moments, but for the most part they are best buds. As I was explaining to J two mornings ago, he has only two brothers. (Trust me when I say there will be no more.) He'd better think about treating them better to keep them around longer. If you were sitting near a window relaxing and enjoying your coffee Memorial Day morning, I'm sorry his extremely loud maniacal laughter and dancing disturbed your peace.

My Large Mirror

I'm trying to move to a more minimal lifestyle. The old materialistic, have-to-have-lots, accumulation days have given way to the one-more-stupid-thing-to-dust days.

I have a beautiful full-length cheval mirror. I don't use it much because I really don't do the head to toe, dress to impress thing that often. It's mostly a toy for the Babiest to push back and forth while making dents in the wall. I've been thinking of either sending it away or at least moving it to the attic for a while to see if I really miss it.

This morning my perspective changed when I received this in a forwarded email. Look closely at an area that will get you slapped for looking at in real life. It's hard to see in the smaller image here. I don't know who took the large smiley face photo in order to offer credit, but it does give one pause for thought doesn't it? I think I will just put up with the dents in the wall in order the have the security of not making such wardrobe errors. Then again, the fact that I wouldn't be caught dead in something even remotely resembling the foundation garment in the picture does give me a bit of emotional security.

And it makes me miss the by-gone days of slips. Boy I'm old!!

Sissy's New Pet

Sissy has a very obnoxious way of telling us something isn't right in her world. We call it her "snake bark." She's identified many snakes so we feel confident with the name. Yesterday morning came a bark that can only be identified as a not-quite-a-snake bark. Close, but not the same thing.

The boys wouldn't let me investigate without proper protective measures. I grabbed a spatula (plastic, of course, since the stainless steel one was in the dishwasher) and took off to the backyard.

Here's what we found.



He's a cute little guy, about 8 inches long and apparently very scared. We put the not-so-bright one in her box inside so the new pet could get away in peace. It took the opportunity and moved. They really have a bum rep with the slow thing...this one could move! It moved toward the fence and must have finally got out.

Then again, I'm hearing a something is not quite right bark right now. Maybe he's back for a playdate. If he is then perhaps they should be known as not-so-bright animals instead of very, very slow animals. Sissy will share the title.

Who Invented Coffee?

I'm not exactly sure of the answer and I'm not in the mood to research it. However, I do know that on some mornings I really, really appreciate his foresight. There are days I could probably give him a big smooch, but I'm quite certain he's dead. That fact puts my gratitude more on a philosophical level.

Instead, I'd suggest he be given the Nobel Peace Prize posthumously. Under one condition only...



...he must share it with the guys who invented the espresso and the latte.

Have a fun, caffeine-filled day!!

My New Adventure

I've probably mentioned how things are a little busy for me and they tend to keep me away from my blog for long periods of time. Okay, you're right. I complain about how busy I am and use it as an excuse for not blogging. I confess. I'm not making any promises, but I am working really hard to blog more and complain less. Or sleep less and complain more. Or clean house less and complain more. That sounds like the best plan of all.

On with my story. I've taken on a new project. I started it in the spring and got lazy. So I started again in the fall. I'm lazy at the moment, but will pick it up again at some point. The new project is...drum roll please...lawn maintenance. A more specific description is something along the lines of flower bed reconstruction.

And knowing me you know I don't have normal projects. I decided to do something better described as extreme lawn maintenance. You've seen those Internet videos of people doing extreme sports such as sliding down a mountain on a dinner plate in a Speedo or launching themselves into the heavens using a wrecking ball and a seesaw.

I guess I must have recently partaken of such an influential piece of visual motivation when I trimmed a tree in the backyard. Tell me what you think, please.


You don't think I went too far, do you?

Always be Prepared for Any Situation

As a mom, I strive to be prepared for every situation. For example, I've never left the house without a completely stocked diaper bag. Nevermind, bad example. I'll rescind that one in case you've spotted my van rapidly traveling toward home with a nekkid child wrapped in a bunch of fast food napkins.

Before I drift off subject again, let me tell you how totally prepared I was for this wonderful snowfall last Thursday. I'm sure you've noticed in the video and pictures already posted there are a few areas where I lacked.

Sadly, the Bigs did not have waterproof shoes.

Nor did they have hats. Thanks CC for calling me down on that one...Ms. Snow Expert! Even if we did have hats and scarves they would have been promoted to snowman attire anyway.

They didn't have parkas, or whatever those big plastic-y looking stuffed coats are called.

We didn't have an ice scraper to get the windshields clear. Then again, barring an emergency we were not about to travel on the roads. Who around here is prepared to drive in this stuff?

Despite all of this, I am prepared. I can prove it!

We have a sled...a real, live, honest-to-goodness sled! Unfortunately we have no hills.

We used our imaginations.